The Good Karma Divorce
Divorce is without question a “ten” on the scale of painstaking, high-stress, emotional challenges! I’ve heard it described as “open heart surgery without an anesthetic” but this level of unremitting despair and heartache need not be the only way to approach the dissolution of a marriage. Therapeutic guidance is a tremendous aid in working through the difficulties and challenges with dignity, courage, and an occasional sense of humor. There are many different stages that people choose to come into therapy over divorce issues, from sorting things out, strategizing during negotiations, dealing with guilt and fear, and talking confidentially to someone who understands the territory they are going through with a compassionate ear, and offers professionally a confidential, non-judgmental, place of support, empathy, and gentle guidance during the journey. The advent of a breakup or divorce forces a person to choose a new path. One direction can be destructive and therefore weakening, while another can build strength, wisdom, depth of character, humility, and self-awareness. That is the path of “the good karma divorce.”
What is a “Good Karma Divorce?”
Perhaps you are in a pattern of chronic battling, or there has been an infidelity that you are trying to heal but can’t get past; maybe you or your partner have come to the realization that you want to make a break, a fresh start in a new direction, for many possible known and unknown reasons. In some cases, even the D word itself terrifies you and you hold it as terrible secret, but you are chronically unhappy in your marriage, and can no longer rule out this ultimate change completely. What do you do? In all these and many other examples, what you probably need is a confidential and compassionate place to release emotions, tell your true story, and begin the work on a deeper, more soulful, level than you have been. There is an opportunity here for you to grow. You will benefit from an experienced professional to talk to and help you navigate through this long process and crisis of uncertainty and significant (not necessarily “drastic”) change for the better.
There’s a wonderful book that I personally recommend that discusses how divorce can be a noble, conscious, growthful, and even heroic path to take. It’s called The Good Karma Divorce written by Judge Michele Lowrance, a domestic relations judged in the Circuit Court of Illinois. The good karma divorce is a template, guiding principle, and goal which I support for my clients going through relationship break-up, and I can help you explore and implement this insightful and compassionate approach.
As Judge Lowrance writes “You might be in the middle of your divorce right now, or you might still be locked in mortal combat over a divorce that happened a decade ago. You can’t completely eliminate the negative emotions or rewrite history, but you can discover a way to transform them into powerful thoughts and actions. At the very least you do not want to compound your misfortune by sentencing yourself to further injury. Divorce does not need to be the defining moment for the rest of your life. I have seen this pain transformed, and considering the law of karma is a good start.”
Contact me for either individual or couples therapy if you are looking for an approach to your break-up that emphasizes a good karma attitude which can lead you ultimately to resolve your divorce with composure, wisdom, and bravery. We can work in my office or even by phone or Skype from anywhere in the US.
Call Dr. Art Rosengarten (760) 944-6710